Archive - Philosophy RSS Feed

The Subtle Self

April 7, 2010 in God, Philosophy with 1 Comment

Boy do I love me. I’m brilliant, funny, charming, creative and spontaneous. I’m a leader, a deep thinker and a profound problem-solver. I’m a decent dad and a wonderful husband – just ask my family. I care about my church and its effectiveness and desire to be used to impact my world. What’s not to love, right?

Well…while those things are mostly true, there’s a subtle shift in what drives that perception – it’s about me…more specifically, it IS me that I give credit to the list. I’m learning that subtle shift is quite profound as God removes the mud from my eyes.

You see, for the longest time, I’ve been proud of me – perfectly willing to see the goodness that has been in my life as a product of my own devices. For those that need it simple – this is pride and if you want to get your bell rocked, do a Bible word search on pride and see what God has to say about it. Let me assure you, it ain’t pretty.

But not any more. Not for me.

Don’t misunderstand, I still believe all of those things I said above, but I’m now giving the credit to the one who made me and has been at work in my life for a long time. God is directly responsible and deserves all of the credit for any good thing that is in and of me and any good thing in my life. See the shift?

I’ll even go one step further and say that even the tough stuff is God’s doing. I’ve been listening to Andy Stanley lately via his podcast and in his message series “The Legend of Joe Jacobson” he talks about Joseph, son of Jacob.

Here’s a synopsis of the story:

  • Joseph was Jacob’s favorite son (probably because he was the youngest)
  • He was sold into slavery by his BROTHERS
  • Purchased by a big dog Egyptian
  • Given authority over this guys estate
  • Framed for adultery
  • Thrown into prison
  • Given a special position in the prison by the warden
  • Asked to interpret Pharaoh’s dreams
  • Given authority over the entire Egyptian nation, which was the largest and most powerful at the time
  • And is finally reconciled to his family through a wild turn of events

It’s a fascinating story and what stands out in the story if you go and read it is that over and over we are reminded that God was with Joseph at every turn. From the depths of despair at the bottom of a well to the heights of his power and authority as the 2nd in command of all Egypt – God was with Joseph and Joseph understood that truth so much that it affected every decision he made. The best illustration of this is when he was asked if he could interpret Pharaoh’s dream:

14 Then Pharaoh sent and called Joseph, and they quickly brought him out of the pit. And when he had shaved himself and changed his clothes, he came in before Pharaoh. 15 And Pharaoh said to Joseph, I have had a dream, and there is no one who can interpret it. I have heard it said of you that when you hear a dream you can interpret it. 16 Joseph answered Pharaoh, It is not in me; God will give Pharaoh a favorable answer.

If ever there was a time to ascribe brilliance to one’s self, it was then. His very neck was on the line, but Joseph chose differently because he knew that God was with him – especially in the tense momemts. Wow!

So, I submit myself to God and ascribe all that is in me, of me and because of me to Him who made me – my Father. May His Grace and Mercy continue to fall on me…as I surely need it.

Father, thank you for the divine gift of how you made me. My desire is to not squander these gifts, talents and abilities on meaningless things and may you change my heart so that my default reaction is to ascribe all things, both the valley and mountaintop, to you. I don’t understand all this means, but I know you love me, have a plan for me and, most importantly, are with me for all time.

Priorities

January 21, 2010 in God, Life, Philosophy with 0 Comments

ImportantExamining one’s life for any length of time (in one sitting) is either a luxury reserved for vacation or the result of something gone wrong (more likely). One reason to go through this exercise is to make sure that you are spending your time on the best things instead of a collection of good things.

Being part of a large and vibrant church, opportunities to get involved are in great abundance because God is doing a ton of amazing things in the lives of His people. I’m glad the resources and organization are available for me to “plug in” and contribute. But there is a hidden trap there too. Let me explain.

Exclude church for a minute (you may anyway), life is full of causes, entertainment and obligations that eat our time…if we let them.  We can look up one day and wonder where the week, month or even year went. These are good things; worthy things to give our time to, but are the best things for me – based on how God made me?

Add church back in and it becomes quite clear that getting an overcrowded schedule is EASY…as easy as saying “Yes.” YES is fun and rewarding and appreciated…until the YES becomes a “how am I going to get it all done?” Then it becomes something different altogether. Guilt and disappointment start to reign in our minds when we can’t meet the obligations we so eagerly signed up for – fun becomes un-fun, un-rewarding and resented.

Want fun and fulfillment to mark your life again? The answer is simple, but the implementation is hard. It is found in just two letters: N, O. I know what you’re thinking. NO isn’t fun – it’s harsh and offensive and divisive…anything but fun. And you’re right. For whatever reason, we are wired to resist saying NO to people and “good” things until we are reminded of the  awful feeling of having too much task and not enough daylight.

Saying NO is the precursor to being able to say YES to the right things – the BEST things. It is also the best way to create pockets of time in your schedule that you can turn over to God and let Him have a say.

So, here’s the challenge: of all of the things you do and all of the obligations you have each week, what are the most valuable…not most important or hardest to do without or even hardest to get out of. Put everything on the table – nothing is safe. As that list is formed – ask yourself why you think those things are the most valuable. Develop an answer for all of them.

As you mull that over, think about your values. If you have a family, what are your family values. Here are a few areas to consider:

  • Financial: what is your belief about debt? savings? giving?
  • Spiritual: do you go to church? why do you go to church? why not? Do you value God’s Word as an integral part of how you live?
  • Marriage: how permanent is your marriage? How do you want to honor your mate?
  • Family: what character traits to you want to focus on in your children? What are the “non-negotiables” in your home? How many nights a week are we going to eat at the dinner table together?
  • Relationships: how close do you want to be with your parents? your siblings? your children?  your neighbors? your best friend?

Now marry the two lists together. Do the reasons you have for how you spend your time match the values you say you believe? If not, perhaps adjustments in the former list need to be made. You see, values don’t change – they are the core of who we are and are immune to our circumstance. Therefore, they should be the starting place once you start to say YES again after a time of saying NO.

Add back into your life the BEST things based on your personal and family values. Resist the temptation to deviate. Because in the end, it is your responsibility to use the time you have and make the most of it.

The Skit Guys have a video talking about this very process that may help bring some clarity.


YouTube Direct-What is God's Will

Surviving the Valley – Legacy

January 20, 2010 in God, Life, Philosophy with 2 Comments

Reach into the ValleyThis is the third and final installment in the Surviving the Valley series. Part I and Part II were focused on gearing up for and making it out alive respectively. This post, though, turns our attention outward.

One of the most unexpected things that has happened in my valley experiences have been the reactions of God’s people – both helpful and hurtful. Both equally floored me. You see, helping people in the valley is extremely hard – I mean really helping. It is more than a word or a gesture because the valley is more than a pothole. And, I’m convinced more and more, it isn’t until we have the war wounds of the valley that we understand that.

Here are some basic things to keep in mind when considering stepping foot into someone else’s valley:

  1. The situation can’t be resolved easily or it would have by the time you heard about it. If you move toward someone hurting, be prepared for a lengthy stay. If you can’t or don’t want to offer something more than words of advice, it is much better to simply pray.
  2. If your first instinct is to shake your finger and tell someone how the choices they made led to their situation, step away from the ledge. The valley isn’t the time or place to beat people up over what they did wrong. Again, just pray.
  3. Get right with God! Entering someone else’s valley will require the ability to relay wisdom gained directly from God. It isn’t about what you know, but what God is doing that is important. If your relationship with God is anything less than vibrant, your effectiveness as a vessel of God for this person will be diminished.

In essence, our hearts need to break for those that are hurting; while at the same time we get a tinge of excitement because we know that God is up to something very special. Our own valley experiences have given us this perspective.

That’s the wonderful paradox of the valley – hard times = greatest change. The metaphors in Scripture are plentiful:

  • The refiner’s fire
  • The runner’s race
  • Iron sharpening iron
  • The cross

So the question remains on just how do you help someone in the valley. Your heart is breaking for them and you feel called to step into the middle of it because you know they need to be propped up. While there isn’t a formula, two things made the biggest difference for me in the valley:

  1. Expressions of love. Whenever someone would come up and hug my neck and tell me that they love me and are praying, it was like a warm bed on a cold morning. It is hard to comprehend how restorative an simple, selfless act of love can be. I learned a ton about how much people loved me through these kind acts.
  2. An ear to listen. For some, the truths being taught in the valley are revealed through a verbal discourse. This usually isn’t a request for “answers”, but more often just the need to get something inside to the outside.

As I’ve said before, valley-goers are a rare breed. I wish it weren’t true and I have several theories about why that is, but you’ve suffered enough by this point reading my ramblings. You are still there…right??? Just checking.

In short, hug their neck, clear your schedule for when God calls you to sit a spell and pray like crazy that His Will be done in their heart. Other than that, sit back and be ready to rejoice at the top of the next rise because there won’t be a lack of things to talk about.

Your legacy in the lives of others can come from many places – I hope for some of you, it will be in the form of a valley-goer for someone in need.


YouTube Direct-The Mourning Booth

Surviving the Valley – Lessons

January 20, 2010 in God, Life, Philosophy with 2 Comments

To the StudentNOTE: This is the second installment in this series. Some contextual information was laid out in “Landscape” and might prove helpful if you haven’t seen it.

In the 23rd Psalm, King David shares some very keen insight into our relationship with God using the metaphor of sheep and shepherding. The first post, Landscape, gave some background and context to the valley, sheep and the shepherd. It is now time to apply that to us and God. Primarily, I want to talk about verse 4:

4
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

Mark Henry of Fellowship Bible Church preached on this very verse recently and one of the things that I took away from it was his attention on the first two words: EVEN THOUGH.

The first three verses were spent describing the high places – the good times in life. These two little words carry over the Truth revealed in those high places into the valley, which represent the hard times in life. In essence, he is calling us to take with us into the valley the loveliness of rest and refreshment; safety and security; blessing and restoration.

This should be a sobering transition because it means that we will need those things to survive the valley; thus painting the valley as undesirable before we even get to the “shadow of death” part.

VALLEY OF THE SHADOW OF DEATH
The “valley of the shadow of death” makes me remember who the author of this passage is.

David
King
Father
Passionate
Fearless

He lost a good portion of his life on the run from Saul’s pursuit. He lost a son and had another betray him. His life was marked by a lot of pain and some deep dark valleys…parts of his life that he would never get back, which is one way to describe death. But it wasn’t death for him…but a shadow of death – the reality of death without dying. No wonder we reel upon entering the valley; why we long for the overeaten pastures that were heavenly just before and desperately try to figure out a way back.

The first moments in the valley are some of the most critical. It’s dark and disorienting. We want to ask, “Why am I here?” We clamor for understanding and the need to make sense of our new surroundings overwhelms us. And yet, the Shepherd calls us to not fear based on His very presence. You get the sense that He is saying, “Be still and listen to me. I have a plan.”

Lesson #1: Upon entering the valley, resist the urge to ask, “Why?” Instead, ask, “God, what are you up to?” Scripture is clear that God, not only wants to be, but will be involved intimately in the Beliver’s life. He is sovereign over ALL – the high places as well as the valley and all points in between.

This response requires two things:

  1. An unwavering belief that God loves you. It is the valley where we really learn this lesson, so don’t be surprised or ashamed if you question this in the midst of hard times. He wants to answer that question with complete clarity!
  2. A supernatural trust that He is on our side and orchestrates all things to our benefit.

They (whoever they are) say that hindsight is 20/20 and both of these beliefs are aspects of our relationship with God that are greatly affected by looking back down into the valley from the high places. The more trips through hard times, the easier it is to move to asking the right question. It doesn’t necessarily ease the pain, but it helps us gain the right perspective from the onset.

Remember that the valley is defined by multiple high places. Just one high place means that the decent is into a plain or plateau. This is very good news for us as it means there are good times ahead. This simple acknowledgment is very powerful. The valley can produce an unknown condition of the future and if left to fester can lead to hopelessness. Remembering there is a high place ahead of us, even if it is unimaginable, can start to restore our hope that, eventually…”this too shall pass.”

Lesson #2: The valley is a transition between two high places and tasty grass is part of your future. Even if physical death occurs in the valley, heaven becomes the next high place. Allow the hope we have in Him to be your source of hope in the midst of despair.

Just as the valley is defined by high places, those high places are separated by some distance. Otherwise, we would see a mountain ridge and not a valley. Walking through the valley usually takes considerable time and, from my own experience, much longer that we like. If we can hang onto the truths that He loves us and that He is trustworthy; if we can lift our eyes up just enough to catch a glimmer of hope – perhaps we can find some endurance to find the meaning of the valley.

One thing is for sure – the valley didn’t happen by chance. God was not surprised by what happened to you, but rather is using it to shape and mold you to the person of Christ. We can either embrace what He is doing or rebel against it. Again, past trips through the valley make this decision easier.

I’m reminded of the apostle Peter. Could Christ have physically prevented Peter from being in a public place that night when he denied his Master? Sure – He could have told James and John to not let Peter out of their sight. Ever wonder why He didn’t? I think the denial of Christ – especially because of Peter’s staunch denouncement of this prophecy – was exactly what was required to crystallize his faith for the work depicted in Acts. God had a plan and He knew what Peter would need and used the valley of betrayal to accomplish His goals.

Lesson #3: Take time to properly grieve and explore what God wants you to experience. The valley is a metaphor for a process intended to induce change. That change should be welcome even if the process isn’t.

Finally, there is the proclamation that David makes that we are not alone and this, along with the rod and staff, provide comfort. The degree to which that comfort affects us is directly proportional to the depth of understanding of the truths set forth in the preceding words. Spiritual maturity, the measure of one’s head and heart understanding of God and His ways, is what God is interested in.

He uses many different tools to produce maturity in our lives. He uses His Word to take and apply in our daily lives and to provide insight into His character. He uses the Holy Spirit to speak to our souls and provide encouragement and correction when needed. He uses our circumstances to teach us very tangible lessons. And then He uses people to fill in the gaps.

While the details of most valleys are intensely personal, the journey is best done with company. And the best company is found in valley veterans – people that have been through their own valleys and know what you are feeling. All valley experiences have some aspects in common and it is possible for someone to genuinely empathize with you. The trick is finding these special “valley-goers”, or rather allowing them to find you.

The valley makes us want to hide – to pull the covers over our heads and not come out until after the winter snow has thawed. Pride, shame, condemnation and even embarrassment are tools that Satan uses to keep us separated from the rest of the flock where we are prone to be devoured. The solution is two-fold:

  • Remember the lessons learned
  • Move in faith to someone close and ask for prayer

Notice I didn’t say to ask for HELP. Most people don’t know how to help someone in the valley, but we all need prayer. Asking for prayer is also a good way to signal to those valley-goers that you need their company – a coded message if you will. These special people are lights in the darkness and blessings from the Father.

Lesson #4: You are not alone. Certainly, God is with you and He will, at times, bring others into the valley with you to help carry the load. Embrace and cherish them for the gifts they are.

The valley is a metaphor for tough times in our life – the real-world experience of James 1:2-4, but if we can recognize it for what God intends, we will encounter Him in those hard places and as a result – experience Joy. The final installment in this series, Legacy, is what it means to take your valley experiences and give them away.

The Center Line and the Horizon

January 18, 2010 in God, Life, Philosophy with 0 Comments

Ditch View of the Center LineIn the recent past, if you were to ask me, “How’s it going?”, I would jokingly reply, “Well, I’m between the ditches.” Translation: Life was moving down the road and I had managed to keep from putting it in the ditch, but that was about all I could say.

The ditch was a metaphor for when much wailing and gnashing of teeth took place – either through my own or some external mess. You see, life for me had become about setting up “barriers” that would help me hug the center line – as far away from the ditch as possible. Don’t get me wrong, I still found myself in the ditch, crumpled and smoking and in need of a tow truck and a body shop. So the strategy wasn’t without it’s kinks, but it was what I knew…

Until December 2009.

My bride and I were on a rare date with dinner at Pei Wei. We ran into some friends that were also on a date that asked what we were doing afterwards. We didn’t have any plans and when we asked back, they said they were going to a Shane & Shane concert. Our eyes lit up as this is one of our favorite bands. We found out where they were playing and had a great time.

On the drive home, literally on the freeway, God asked me to forget the ditches and focus on Him. My mind immediately recognized this as how it should be and in that moment, He showed me that ditch avoidance games weren’t the answer. He made it clearer than ever that my relationship with Him is what will keep me hugging the center line.

It’s a subtle shift for me, but a profound one to be sure. On the surface it seems scary until I’m reminded of who I’m placing my trust in – He, and He alone, will make my paths straight! Besides, I’m much more excited about chasing after Him than I am in fighting my own nature as a ditch-avoidance strategy.

Men – Who has your Back?

January 5, 2010 in God, Leadership, Life, Love, Philosophy with 3 Comments

God has been stirring in my heart over the past several weeks and the Tipping Point (great book) was a friend of mine torpedo-ing his life. I say the Tipping Point (great book BTW by Malcolm Gladwell) because God has been working on this in me for a while now, but seeing a friend lose everything in a blink of an eye made it very real and God used it to knock me off center.

One of the “ah-ha’s” from my friend’s situation was me concluding that nobody was close enough to him to identify the signs that led to his very public failure. There wasn’t anyone with enough relational capital to get in his chili about the condition of his heart and what he was doing to stay out of the deep weeds. I concluded this because I’m confident that had a person like that existed, things would be different for my friend.

That conclusion sparked another rabbit trail centered around the analogy of war. I had just finished watching Band of Brothers for the tenth time and that provided the visuals God needed to bring some very important points home to me:

  1. No war is won by an individual – it takes a team. Not just any team, but a well-trained, strongly led, close-knit group of soldiers with a common mission and like minded strategies.
  2. Success is a result of solid preparation, great execution and fanatical perseverance. The soldiers of Easy Company that jumped in behind enemy lines on D-Day (from the series) had all of the ingredients to play a critical role in winning World War II. They trained tirelessly, kept their heads in the heat of battle and dug in like ticks when they absolutely had to hold that line.
  3. There’s a time to play it smart and a time to get crazy. Taking undue risks usually meant trouble for those soldiers except when it was the last thing the enemy expected. Wisdom is knowing the difference and that comes from great leadership.
  4. We need men around us that would weep if we died. One of the things that can’t be calculated tactically is the extent we would fight for those we love. The war produced a bond that was both unexpected and surprisingly strong. When that bond was threatened, logic faded, raw emotion took over and survival became the sole focus. And when survival didn’t happen, their hearts broke and were never the same.

I started trying to take an inventory of my own life against these principles and I found myself sorely lacking in every one of them – and that scared me.

  • I don’t feel like I’m on any teams that both believe victory is possible and have a consensus about how it can be achieved.
  • I don’t feel like I’m prepared or execute very well and at the first sign of resistance, I crumble like a Christmas cookie wondering where my fallback position is.
  • I play it smart when I should be charging the hill and I charge the hill when I should be playing it smart. Sounds like Paul’s famous passage in Romans 9:15.
  • I also don’t think there is any man who would miss me so much that tears would be the result of my passing.

This is very sad to me and not how I wanted it to be at 37 years old. And God tells me that isn’t how He wants it either. Scripture is filled with references to how important it is to live life in the context of close relationships. Love implies that very condition and we are called to love above all else.

I’ve thought a ton about how I got here and why the principles listed above aren’t more true of me and perhaps they will find themselves listed out in another post; however, I want to conclude by telling you that I am on a journey mission crusade to change this.

  • I’m going to be sure that the teams I serve not only believe victory is possible, but they have a good sense of how it will be achieved – especially those in the Church.
  • I’m going to better prepare my mind and heart with His Word and use it when making decisions and facing the hard things in my life.
  • I’m going to more frequently use prayer for wisdom when discerning  the difference between hunkering down and issuing a battle cry.
  • I’m going to, in faith, reach out to my friends and figure out a way to move those relationships to the next level. I’m ready to be open and honest and place my heart in their and His hands in the hopes that it will produce a bond that makes a difference in the middle of a firefight.

I’m so convinced that these steps are no longer negotiable that I’m going to dedicate this year to seeing real change in this arena. And now that I’ve made my plans public, you are free to ask me how it’s going. I hope you will from time to time and I also hope you will take a moment to assess where you are and come up with your own action plan to ensure that no man is allowed to take himself out of the fight.

Page 3 of 6«12345»...Last »